Friday, June 30, 2006


Friends are good to have. I have 2 I consider most precious. My best friend, I left sleeping in bed this morning, her golden hair falling softly across her face and the rhythm of her breathing soft and blissful. Even there, her beauty captivates me. My wife desreves all the awards one could think of, including a purple heart for the times I've wounded her, but especially one for her friendship.

My other "best" friend is my guitar, any one of them. I don't know if I can adequately explain this relationship, but I'll give it a shot. Companion would be a good place to start, just knowing it's close is comforting, and here's why. For the majority of my life now, I've made my living with my guitar. Sure there have been times when "other" work was necessary to make ends meet, but it wasn't my friends fault. So a common feeling when me and my friend are together is one of accomplishment, there's a job to do and together we'll "git 'er done!"

Another feeling, and perhaps the one that began the relationship is one of voice. Like no other, this friend has the ability to give voice to my innermost thoughts without words. If you listen, you can get a glimpse into my very soul through the music I play when I'm alone. My best friend - my wife - has learned that, and I appreciate the way she listens. Along with that comes the ability to "take me away". It's easy to get "miles away" with my friend, even in the most crowded, hectic situations. (That goes for both of them!)

So this morning I pray for you that you too have a friend or two like these I've been blessed with. May your friends captivate and comfort you. May they make your work light and your play enjoyable. May they love you for you.


Thursday, June 29, 2006

Getting Your Bearings

Well, I suppose the burning question is..."What the heck has been going on the last year?" And that's a fair question, some of you know the answer, and for the rest of you I guess it's only fair I help you get your bearings since I've invited you on this path with me.

It was a little over a year ago that my wife was diagnosed with Hepatitis C. The prescribed treatment was chemo therapy for 48 weeks due to her particular strain. Let me just say it's been a long year. When you're in the middle of something like this, and I was just a bystander although it took it's toll on the whole family; it's gut-check time. I faced it at about 40 weeks in.

"IT" is that place where you wake up and realize that you're unsure if you can "do what you have to do" another day. I surprised myself with that thought, I felt like a failure. Imagine, I wasn't even taking medicine, yet I seemingly had no hope to offer, and was unsure I could be helpful at all. I wanted to quit, and "I" there wasn't anything for me to quit. I was just tired of the circumstances I found myself in and wanted them to change.

I guess that's a classic definition of losing hope. See, I happen to know that I'm a hope junkie, I live on the stuff, and I believe in my heart of hearts that there is always hope for a better tomorrow (my checkered past is proof positive). But in this particular situation, I had lost mine. I liken it to how prisoners and hostages must feel. Perhaps early on, there is hope that things will soon change, but over the course of time, the day in and day out of being in something that you have no control over begins to wear on you. Your hope slowly fades, and desperation begins to replace it. That's the road I've been walking this past year.

Now I've got to tell you that things have changed. My wife finishes her treatment tomorrow, all the tests along the way have shown that her body is responding positively (though we won't know for sure until December), and the fog of desperation has gone from my view. Hope has returned!

As stated in the title of this blog, it's a shared journey. I'm no one special, not looking for sympathy or help, just telling my story and asking you to share yours. Life can be tough. Are you going through something right now? Do you feel that hope has left the building? Let me tell you that it can return, and most likely will. The key, I've found, is that you have to look for it. God, friends, family, even professional counseling can help you gain a different perspective and I highly recommend all of them.

I hope to hear from some of you. Leave a comment and if you'd liked to subscribe to this blog, just click the link over on the right. Oh yeah, another interesting thing to watch may be the ad link at the bottom of the page. The set up allowed me to choose "relate ad to blog content". Should be funny to see what "they" think goes along with our journey.

Safe travels.

Monday, June 26, 2006

Welcome Fellow Traveler

So, here it is. After a solid year, I begin anew my foray into self-published views on life. You see, I'm no stranger to this medium, only it's delivery I suppose. Some six years ago, I published a weekly email newsletter that reached subscribers of nearly 300. Web-posted journals have come and gone, mostly due to the demands on my life at the time. And as life is prone to do, the ebb and tide now affords me time for sharing, observing, commenting and otherwise pontificating (not-so-much) about the things that make up my life and the path I'm following through it.

Knowing how life can be, my only promise is an update once a week. Who knows, this blog may become more prolific in it's updating, but I really hope that the time between posts will be time that you share your thoughts and comments. I believe that due to the shear number of oxygen consuming humans on this planet, shared experiences, hopes and feelings are more common than we let on. It's those commonalities, as well as the differences that I hope to discover along the way.

So here's the frame of reference of my views: American male, married with children. A love for God, music and life. We can unpack those down the road. Thanks for joining me.